Happy birthdays to me. Five birthdays in September and one i
Feb 21, 2014 7:16:10 GMT -6
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Post by poseygilbert on Feb 21, 2014 7:16:10 GMT -6
Happy birthdays to me.
Five birthdays in September and one in January.
By: Posey Gilbert
By: Posey Gilbert
At the age of 19 I had a most remarkable dream, if that is what it was.
In it I met my oldest brother in this beautiful park, that is he told me he was my oldest brother to which I immediately told him he was not, Chuck was my oldest brother.
"I know Chuck," he said with a gentle laugh and we began to walk down this long winding path.
As we walked he rested his arm about my shoulders, he said, "I know Mother and Daddy too"
He then called off the names of all my siblings, my aunts, uncles, cousins, and grand parents too stating that he knew them all.
Some of the names I did not know or recognize.
When I told him that I didn't know those names he gave that gentle laugh again and said I had many relatives that I did not yet know but one day I would know them all.
His voice was so comforting and certain that although perplexing it did not alarm me and despite my knowing he was not my older brother I could not help but to trust, and like him.
At this point we came to a black gate and he opened it to let me through and closed it behind me,
"Aren't you coming too?" I asked surprised at this sudden turn of events.
"No, you go on from here by yourself that road will lead you home.
"But don't you want to see Mother and the rest of us too?" I asked.
"Not at this time Butch," he said with that gentle but now disconcerting laugh, "but if you can remember to, tell Mother you saw me, OK?"
I turned to look down the road and when I looked back he and that black gate and beautiful park were gone.
I looked back toward the road home, but saw only the prison gray ceiling of my bedroom, I had awakened.
Getting up the scent of fresh coffee called me to the kitchen where Mother was making breakfast.
"Happy birthday Butch," She said setting a cup of coffee on the table for me.
"It is your birthday today isn't it?" she asked.
"One of them," I answered grumpily picking up the cup,
"Every time I send off for a birth certificate I get a new date, the last said January eleven."
Mother laugh.
"How many does that make now?" she asked.
"Six" I said "Five in September and one in January."
"Well, Butch I do believe I was somewhere in the area at the time you were born," she said, "and I think it was just before midnight September eight."
"Well, why the hell can't they get it right?" I asked, " It's a pain in the *bleep* not knowing."
"That's my fault," she said, " You were so quiet in me I was sure you were going to be a girl, you were not like your hard headed brother Chuck, he kicked the hell out of me.
So when you were born they put down Boy Gilbert.
Then when your Grandpa Posey found out you were a boy he demanded I name you after him, but I didn't want to name you Posey.
It wasn't until I was ready to leave with you five days later that a nurse friend of mine saw your birth certificate still said Boy Gilbert and asked why I hadn't named you yet, I'd told her I didn't want to name you Posey
After my father and started to cry, she said "For God's sake name him Posey and call him Butch!"
Then Mother gave a laugh and said,
"Everyone thought you were the cutest little girl they ever saw."
"What?!" I choked into my coffee.
"I told you I and everybody thought you were going to be a girl.
Everything you had to wear was pink," she said laughing again" That's probably why you wear all that black today."
She pointed to the clock.
"You better get some speed on," she said, "you don't want to be late for work your first week on the job."
It was later that week as I was sitting at the table watching Mother as she was preparing dinner that my dream from earlier in the week came into mind.
"Mother," I asked, "do I have an older brother?"
"Of course you do,' she said turning away from the simmering pots,
"Why are you asking me such a foolish question?"
"No, I mean one older than Chuck?" I asked.
"Not unless James was whoring around and has one out there that he or I don't know about," she said wiping her hand on a towel and sitting down at the table.
"No," I said, "I meant you and Pop."
An over boiling pot interrupted and she quickly returned to the stove.
I then told her my dream.
After lowering the flame and stirring the pots contents she suddenly said,
"You know Butch, I did give birth to a baby boy before Theresa was born but it did not live long.
It was born without any pigment at all; you could see its guts.
They would not let us take him home, the doctor said that those types of babies never lived long.
He was right the baby died before we left the hospital.
She became saddened and silent and returned to her work I regretted asking her the question.
I later found out her sister my aunt Gurlene had also gave birth to one of these babies, as did my godmother.
It was the same with all of them they were not allowed out of the hospital, and died soon after birth.
But now for the Bplgean (Butch Posey Lee Gilbert-ean) Twist as my younger brother Crow labeled these strange twists my life often took.
I was later to come to learn my oldest brother's birth name was Posey Lee Gilbert, which had been the reason Mother never wanted to give me that name.
So who or what was it I'd met in the dream?