Post by lois on Oct 30, 2011 18:31:06 GMT -6
Ron sent this to me about a year ago.. I downloaded it and been searching my computer for it ever since.. I thought it was so cute.. reads as follow..
"Judas Asparagus"...(Priceless!) mm
From : spotless <spotless38@wk.net> Subject : Fw: "Judas Asparagus"...(Priceless!) mm To : barrygaunt <barrygaunt@kymufon.org>
Sun, Feb 13, 2011 09:24 PM
" Judas Asparagus":
(This is amazing and should bring tears of laughter to your eyes. I wonder how often we take for granted that children
understand what we are teaching?)
A child was asked to write a book report on the entire Bible. Here is what was written:
I hope everyone's year is off to a good start!
The Children's Bible in a Nutshell
In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, 'The Lord thy God is one,' but I think He must be a lot older than that. Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!' and someone did.
Then God made the world.
He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet.
Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden.....Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars.
Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel. Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except forMethuselah, who lived to be like a million or something. One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check. After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat. Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil
Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.
"Judas Asparagus"...(Priceless!) mm
From : spotless <spotless38@wk.net> Subject : Fw: "Judas Asparagus"...(Priceless!) mm To : barrygaunt <barrygaunt@kymufon.org>
Sun, Feb 13, 2011 09:24 PM
" Judas Asparagus":
(This is amazing and should bring tears of laughter to your eyes. I wonder how often we take for granted that children
understand what we are teaching?)
A child was asked to write a book report on the entire Bible. Here is what was written:
I hope everyone's year is off to a good start!
The Children's Bible in a Nutshell
In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, 'The Lord thy God is one,' but I think He must be a lot older than that. Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!' and someone did.
Then God made the world.
He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet.
Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden.....Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars.
Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel. Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except forMethuselah, who lived to be like a million or something. One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check. After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat. Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil
Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.